It’s exhausting just listening to Father Gilbert Tairo’s weekly schedule.
As pastor of four parishes in the Arkansas Delta, Father Tairo, CSSp, celebrates 12 Masses each week, plus overseeing a school, administrative office hours, ministering in the state and federal prisons and parish activities.
This doesn’t include celebrating sacraments like confession, weddings and baptisms, or managing the unexpected like sick calls and funerals.
He can travel more than 300 miles weekly.
“The driving is what wears us out,” Father Tairo admits. “You feel you’re worn out, but when you arrive there, the joy we get is the people there. They say, ‘Our priest is here.’ That’s the thing that gives us joy and courage because they appreciate what we are doing for them. They need Jesus.”
In recent years, the responsibilities of priests and religious have increased as vocations have decreased nationwide.
Becoming overwhelmed is a reality.
“It’s a risk. Especially for a missionary diocese. You might find yourself responsible for three or more parishes, driving for hours on end. I’d say it’s a pretty high risk for burnout,” said Father Jeff Hebert, diocesan vocations director. “But I’m given a lot of hope that the Church has recognized that over the last several decades. We’re much more intentional about saying taking a day off is not selfish; it’s a rule.”
In the Diocese of Little Rock, priests and religious find ways to balance their vocations through time away, leisure and support from each other.
Balanced prayer life
Father Hebert said every Catholic can look at the start of life to understand God’s plan for a proper life balance.
“It’s the story of creation — six days of creation; on the seventh day the Lord rested,” he said. “Later, when Jesus was being challenged on sabbath rules and law, he said, ‘The sabbath was made for man, not man for the sabbath.’ God made this day of rest for you because your human nature needs rest. You need it. You need to be recreated. That’s where the word recreation actually comes from — you’re being recreated so you can begin a new week.”
Canon Law 283.2 discusses the need for priests to take time off, stating: “They are entitled, however, to a fitting and sufficient time of vacation each year as determined by universal or particular law.”
Father Jerome Kodell, OSB, 85, a monk at Subiaco Abbey, said a solid, daily prayer life should be a priority.
“I certainly think the first thing that happens when people get out of the seminary is everyone wants them to do everything. In the seminary, things were pretty well taken care of. You were helped, watched and kept a prayer life going,” Father Kodell said. “If that isn’t internalized, it could be you become the magnet for all kinds of people’s jobs and you lose that center. Then you have to recover.”
Mother Mary Clare Bezner, 49, has been prioress of Holy Angels Convent in Jonesboro for three years and an Olivetan Benedictine religious sister for 19 years. The primary vocation of their 22 sisters is prayer and the mission of St. Bernards Healthcare, founded by the congregation 125 years ago.
As prioress, her days consist of office hours, individual meetings with the sisters, hospital board and committee meetings, administration, finance, daily responsibilities of running a convent and recreation time each evening, all surrounding the six scheduled group prayer times. This doesn’t include personal prayer.
“You are going back to God consistently throughout the day, so it’s a balance of work and prayer,” she said. “… Our first work is to pray for the world. That’s a full-time job; people don’t realize that. It can be tough for each of us to show up and do that with a fullness of heart. If you’ve ever been on a long retreat, you have to take breaks. Just imagine 20 years into that. It is a pleasure, it is our calling, but it’s not necessarily easy. Just like marriage and all the vocations are hard, this is work.”
In addition to prayer, Father Hebert encourages the 22 diocesan seminarians to find leisure activities that bring them life.
“I’m an introvert. I love breakfast. On my days off, I usually go out to a local restaurant for a nice breakfast. That’s a simple thing, but my treat for the day. When the weather is nicer, I enjoy fishing,” he said. “… In the winter months, it’s more reading, and I like watching movies too. I go back to basic spiritual books.”
Busy and joyful
Father Brian Cundall, 30, was ordained a priest in 2021. After a year as an associate priest at St. Joseph Church in Conway, he moved to Fort Smith to lead Christ the King Church and School. About 500 families are registered at the parish, and over 300 students attend the school.
“Very,” he said, laughing hard at how challenging it is to pastor a church and school. “I try to keep that perspective that everyone has challenges, and good and bad they deal with. It can be a challenge, but that’s what the Lord is for.”
After starting his morning with an hour of prayer, Father Cundall will go to the parish office and school. He rests midday to prepare for evening meetings and Mass.
“If I don’t take a couple hours for lunch to recharge, I’d be dead in the evening,” he said.
Leaning on lay experts around him to help with big projects, like a capital campaign, and reaching out to his more experienced brother priests for support makes a difference.
“At the times I feel like everything is on fire, after talking to Father John Connell (pastor in Conway), he’ll give me a little of that perspective of, ‘It’s not that bad, it’s OK, here are some things to do,’” Father Cundall said. “I think it’s realizing you’re not alone, and there’s a community of people to lean on.”
Father Tairo, 49, admitted he’s been busy since he became a Spiritan with the Congregation of the Holy Spirit 21 years ago in his native Tanzania. He’s been a priest for 15 years and came to Arkansas in 2015.
He finds time for relaxation on Mondays.
“I love soccer. I always have to watch on Mondays. I have to watch the soccer games from the weekend on YouTube,” he said.
Resources for a balanced life
Religious and lay Catholics pointed to a variety of resources and examples as their go-tos to restore life balance:
- Saint: St. Teresa of Kolkata prayed daily, but it is now known that she experienced a 50-year dryness in prayer, often praying, “Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.” “She was extremely busy and always took time to pray. We found out later on after she died, her prayer was very dry. But she realized faithfulness to prayer was essential to what she was doing.” — Father Jerome Kodell, OSB, monk at Subiaco Abbey
- Book: “Introduction to the Devout Life,” St. Francis de Sales; He explained how everyone can cultivate a relationship with God “according to who you are,” living authentically in their life’s vocation. — Father Jeff Hebert, diocesan vocations director
- Podcasts: “Restore the Glory,” by Catholic therapists Dr. Bob Schuchts and Jake Khym, MA; “Interior Integration for Catholics,” by Dr. Peter T. Malinoski; “Abiding Together,” by Sister Miriam Michelle Benzinger and Heather Khym — Mother Mary Clare Bezner, prioress of Holy Angels Convent
- Book: “Still Amidst the Storm: A Family Man’s Search for Peace in an Anxious World” by Conor Callagher; “It’s a very, very simple book … He has 13 kids and acknowledges in the book he has diagnosed anxiety disorder. It’s about learning to live in the present moment.” — Deacon Jason Pohlmeier, principal of St. Joseph School in Fayetteville
- Song: “Slow Down” by Forrest Frank; Key lyrics, “I just wanna slow down my heart / Walk at the pace of the breeze / I just wanna slow down my mind / To rest like a bird in the trees.” — Deacon Jason Pohlmeier
- Programs: Ignatian spiritual exercises (Retreat in Daily Life); the Called & Gifted Discernment Process by the Catherine of Sienna Institute. — Christy Trantina, adult faith formation director at St. Joseph Church in Conway
CORRECTION: The original publication of this article misspelled Father Gilbert Tairo’s name as Tario. This online version has been corrected.
